Sareet should have a baby.

My pal Sareet is McFuddled. If you read her blog, she's having a tough time deciding some life goals. So I thought I would post something on my blog--beause I know she'll read it eventually--to help her out.

Sareet, you should get knocked up!

Think about it, in a few weeks, I am going to have a baby! And you could potentially be pregnant too! Look at what I went through--didn't it look like fun?? And then our babies could be close in age, and maybe you would have a girl and I could have a boy and they could get married someday--and look how much we would love our in laws! It's perfect!

Plus, it would give you and opportunity to make some goals. You could be like, OK, this is how the baby will fit into my life- and then just fit everything else around it. You could make your life goals things like:

1. Finding the perfect car seat.
2. Finding the perfect car seat for when it gets bigger.
3. Where you want to live--have to consider school districts now.
4. To breastfeed or not to breastfeed--remember, breast is best, but mothers who don't breastfeed can certainly bond with their child over a bottle and love it just as much (yes, that came directly from one of the many classes I took)
5. Choosing a stroller--a deluxe travel system, a jogging stroller for if you are on a health kick, or a lightweight convenience stroller---doesn't have all the bells and whistles of the deluxe travel system, but you can lift it in and out of the truck for quick trips to the mall.
6. Have to stop swearing.
7. Have to stop drinking, at least for 9 months. Longer if you plan to breastfeed (unless you are going to drink, then 'pump and dump'--ha! more lingo from my classes--see what I have learned!)
8. What are you going to name her? Her moniker will be forever, don't choose something embarrassing or dumb that she'll hate when she's a teenager, which of course you can't predict. (No need to think of boy names or even circumcision--we already decided you are having a girl, I am having a boy, and they are getting married).

See all the things I could think of in only a few minutes? life goals, learning new things! Doesn't it sound fabulous, and like the solution to your problem?:)

So quick, go home, use needles to put holes through all your condoms or replace your BC pills with vitamins (oh no! Max doesn't read MY blog, does he?? I hope not, we don't want him to be onto your plan--it's best if this is a, uh, 'surprise' for him, don't you think?). You could be knocked up in no time!

Oh, and from a pregnant mom who's been there? Those lotions and creams to prevent stretch marks--yeah. I don't think they actually really work on all people. It depends mostly on your skin I guess. Good luck with that.

Pig could have a human sister!!

The best part about this post, is that I'm on eastern time, Sareet is on Pacific time, and it's about 7:30 am EST. This will be up for HOURS before she even wakes up, let alone before she even reads it!

I love you, Sareet:) I hope your soul starts feeling better soon, and I hope this made you laugh:). It was meant to. If you are mad, whatever you do, just don't wish me pregnant longer--I can't wait for the kid to COME OUT!!!:):)

Speaking of friends--Kari, where are you?