Let's take a poll, does anyone else think this blows?

I talked to my friend Terry from back home. Just for like 2 minutes. His wife e-mailed him, and told him that Kevin's ex-girlfriend (some of you saw her at the wedding, Debbie--and yes, I know, my husband's ex-girlfriend was at our wedding, I am a freaking saint and allowed her to come because she's the best friend of my sister in law, and she desperately wanted her to come) heard he is coming home Thursday night-alone, I am staying here- and is trying to organize a little group night out to welcome Kevin back for the weekend.

Kevin is trying to get a job back home, and he made it to the next rounds, which is a test. He has to take a test. It's Friday morning, and so we are shelling out the bucks for him to go home Thursday night to take this test Friday morning. Cross your fingers for him, say a prayer, whatever, please, I miss my family and want them to be a part of the baby's life.

My friend Jessica and her husband Jeff made plans to come visit this weekend, and then just at the end of last week, we found out that Kevin made it to the next round and has to take this test this Friday. I am staying here to hang out with Jessica and Jeff. Kevin is flying back here Saturday night.

So apparently, because Kevin is coming home alone, his ex girlfriend Debbie is trying to put together a little 'thing' for him, and wants to include the people renting his house (my sister's in law sister and her husband), my sister in law Alison and Kevin's brother Matt, and Terry and his wife.

When I am home, they NEVER do stuff like this. The last time they did something like this, was the night before Thanksgiving, 2003, when I had first moved out here and Kevin was supposed to pick me up at DTW Thanksgiving morning, and his ex-girlfriend threw him a going away party because after Thanksgiving, he was flying back to Delaware with me. They got him so drunk, that he couldn't come pick me up the next morning, his dad had to do it. Kevin came with him, but he was hung over all day and miserable. And that was the first time I saw him in like 3 weeks.

The thing is, Debbie and him aren't friends. They never talk to each other. The only time she wants to hang out with him is when I'm not around. But I expect this from her. She is crazy I guess, and desperately wants him back. I am angry at everyone else. I am angry at my sister in law and brother in law. I am angry at Terry's wife. Terry said he's not going, and he told his wife that he doesn't think it's right that Debbie plan this party type thing for him when I'm not there, that it's just weird.

I realize that Debbie is their friend. But she's not his friend, and she's not my friend. And even though they are probably closer to her than to me, I can't help but them encouraging this type of weird behavior is disrespectful to our marriage. OK, so she is their friend--but you know what, I have never been anything but nice to them. I have tried to be their friend, even when they have crapped all over me and treated me like dirt. I have been an aunt to Matt and Alison's child--never forgetting a birthday, and always making an effort to do special things for him. We have let Alison's sister and her husband live in the house we have in Bay City and not pay rent for months because we know they don't have jobs. I have remembered anniversaries. I have been kind, I have been a 'good' member of the family, but most of all, I have been married to Kevin for over a year, and with him now for 3 years. Clearly, we love each other and take care of each other. Clearly, he is happy being with me. So even if I weren't to expect some level of respect on behalf of myself because I have been a decent human being, I would most definitely expect some respect on Kevin's behalf, because he is their family, he is their friend, and it's his marriage they aren't respecting as well. Out of respect for Kevin, I think they should say "Debbie, I don't think that's such a great idea. I mean if we want to get together and do something like that, why don't we wait till Elliottpreciouspants is here. Maybe we should just let the guys have a guys night out this time." Or better yet, "You know, Kevin's married now, and he seems like he's happily married, and they are even expecting a child. I know that you really cared about him, but, maybe it's time to let that go."

I'm not worried about Kevin cheating on me. He doesn't even like her, in fact, truth be told, he never really did. He used her for sex a few times. That's about it. But I feel hurt that all of his family and friends (or at least so many of them) are so comfortable disregarding our relationship.

Do I have any support here?

Oh, and by the way, with my current unhappiness of the situation, the list of people not allowed to hold the baby continues to grow...